Brain health · Sanctum

Relationships under strain

You are told you do not listen, that you do not follow through, that you forget what matters. Closeness can run hot and cold, cues get missed, intentions get misread, and conflict escalates faster than you can hold it before the regret sets in.

The same features that shape everything else, the attention, the impulsivity, the rejection sensitivity, the overwhelm, show up most sharply with the people closest to you. It is not a lack of love. The forgetting is not not-caring, the withdrawal is not coldness, and the flare-ups are emotion arriving faster than it can be managed.

Because the hurt is real on both sides, the pattern gets read as a character problem or a failing relationship, and the wiring underneath it is never named. Couples and families end up stuck in a loop neither of them chose.

We look at how the features play out in your closest relationships, because that is often where they cost the most and make the most sense. None of this is a diagnosis. It is what we explore with you.

Written by Dr Asad RaffiConsultant Psychiatrist · Founder & Medical Director