Brain health · Sanctum

Friendships: few, intense, or hard to make

Maybe one or two deep, all-or-nothing friendships rather than a wide circle. Maybe wanting friends and finding the whole thing baffling. Maybe coming on too strong, falling out easily, ending up on the edge. Friendship is rarely simple, and it rarely runs smoothly.

When the social signals do not come automatically, friendship takes more work and lands less predictably. Some pour everything into one intense bond, some misread the room and get left out, some give up and call it being content alone. None of it is a lack of warmth. It is a different way of connecting.

Because difficulty with friendship gets read as a personality problem, or shyness, or being difficult, the reason underneath is missed. For children especially, the loneliness and the fallouts are painful and easy to mistake for ordinary growing pains.

We look at how connection actually works for you or your child, because the shape of friendship tells us a great deal. None of this is a diagnosis. It is what we explore with you.

Written by Dr Asad RaffiConsultant Psychiatrist · Founder & Medical Director