Brain health · Sanctum

Coping that became a habit

Alcohol, scrolling, food, spending, gaming, caffeine. Something that takes the edge off, that quiets the noise or fills the gap or gets you through, and then slowly starts taking more than it gives.

This is rarely about weakness or pleasure-seeking. A dysregulated brain reaches for whatever steadies it, and the things that work, the quick hit, the numbing, the escape, are the ones that pull hardest. What starts as coping can become a habit, and a habit can tip into something that runs the show. The reaching is understandable. It is regulation gone looking for relief.

Because the behaviour is what shows, it gets treated as the problem in itself, while the thing it is medicating, the restlessness, the overwhelm, the rejection sensitivity, goes unaddressed. Tackle only the habit and the need underneath simply finds another outlet.

We look at what the coping is for, not just what it looks like, because the need underneath is where the real work is. None of this is a diagnosis, and there is no judgement here. It is what we explore with you. If any of this has you worried about yourself or someone you love, you do not have to face it alone. Your GP can help, and the Samaritans are on 116 123.

Written by Dr Asad RaffiConsultant Psychiatrist · Founder & Medical Director